Twi-swearstoofuckingmuch's getting ready for Christmas (when she's not on her arse reading fanfiction)

So there's only a few days left until Christmas and getting ready for Christmas around the Twi-swearstoofuckingmuch household is usually a bit of a fail.  For example, the last few years, we'll get the Christmas tree up and then not bother to decorate it or maybe we'll throw a few lights on it and leave it.  I'm a lazy fucker sometimes what can I say?  

This year, I decided, was going to be different.  I planned on morphing into Martha-fucking-Stewart and the Twi-swearstoofuckingmuch household was going to be a festive for once. So far, not too bad.

Cookies baked?

WTF happened to the 2nd batch on the right?  They morphed into these flat blobs.  It's like attack of the ginger snaps.

Check!  

 Tree up? Lights strung?

Check!

Cat yelled at for trying to eat the tree?

 Check!

 Treasured ornaments hung?

Check!

Ah - how lovely!  A fully decorated tree!

I know - it leans towards the left (that's what SHE said!)

Oh - hold on!  I forgot one more thing for the tree.

 

Ta da!  

Yup - Twiswears is a crafty bitch.  I knit several cupcakes for the Christmas tree - even put beads for spinkles on the lil guys!  I was kinda hoping Tattward would magically appear - but alas he didn't. Oh well.  Can't win 'em all.  Maybe Santa will come through for me and I'll find Tattward with a bow strategically placed under my tree Christmas morning. That'd give my parents a surprise! Mr. Twi-Swears might not take it too well either, even as understanding as he is.

Now all this knitting has left Mr. Twi-swearstoofuckingmuch slightly puzzled.  "Cupcakes? On the Christmas tree? Really? Alrighty then"  I figured throwing a few cupcakes on the tree would be the only way I would get a little Twilight reference on the tree without Mr. Swears knowing all about it! Okay, it's a fanfic reference but - I had to find some way to mark the year that Twilight came into my life took over my life.  

Yeah, I just realized that they look like boobs.  I knit fucking breasts for my Christmas tree.  Boobs with a fucking red tassel.  FML.


p.s.  Er...I'm thinking about changing the name of this blog.  I'm thinking musings of a twatwaffle....thoughts?


p.p.s. I took the Mrs. P's Twibite challenge the other day and it's going to be posted here.  Should be good times. Go look tomorrow.  Hell take it!  She's a very funny bitch and it was a total blast to do!