So I was chatting with K_intheflo. (Know her? She's on twitter. And she's hillarious. And we sing together. On twitter. It's sounds lame - but shit it's really fucking fun. You should join us. Go follow her!)
So K and I were chatting about Breaking Dawn. Mainly about how the fuck they were going to make that thing and what parts we'd want left out. And who the fuck is going to direct it. I mean the imprinting, the c-section, the drinking of blood. Let's face it. That book goes majorly downhill part way through the honeymoon and I suspect the movie will too. How the fuck they're going make it into two movies is BEYOND me.
Ya know what pops into my head? What is the poor shmuck director trying to direct some of those scenes in breaking dawn going to do? I mean what a fucking job. I feel equally as bad for the screen writer trying sort through all of SM's writing.
Anywho, while thinking of what directors would be good for BD, for some reason, Woody Allen popped into my head. I guess he knows a thing or two about falling in love inappropriately.*cough* fallinginlovewithyouradopteddaughterisalsmostasfuckingcreepyasimprinting *cough*
Woody: "Okay Taylor. Now for this scene....Errm..I want to look lovingly, at that baby. Now take a good look at the baby and pretend you wanna..well...screw it."
Taylor: "Um..what?"
Woody: *makes frantic circle motions with arms* "Ya know. Look...look at the baby like you...love it.Like you want to have carnal relations with the baby. Eventually."
Taylor: "Really? Like I love it? Isn't that kinda creepy?"
Woody: *sighs* "Look. Just go with it. It's not like you're the adopted father or anything."
10 comments:
He would be perfect for that freaktastic scene. I have no idea how they are going to avoid the whole "EWE GROSS!!!" factor.
I fucking love it. Woody Allen gets my vote! and so do you!
OMFG! srsly. hoolarious. carnal relations, wtf!
(yarnslinger here) you crack me up with this!! I gotta say though...and bear in mind I have not finished reading BD yet...I don't see the imprinting thing as a sexual thing...is this just me being naive??
@ Melissa. Yes. It's you being naive. Imprinting = paedophilia. SM can explain it all she wants. It just fucking creeps me out.
vw-pepee. Jesus blogger.
Bwawawawa!!! OMG!! I'm fucking DYING!!
Woody Allen is insanely creepy. And gross. I think he could pull BD off.
I have no idea how they are going to make that movie but I'm sure it's gonna be a train wreck.
Yes! Brilliant idea LMFAO
First of all, how did I not know about this site?! Although I would have to find a kennel for my kid because my mother would never agree to watch her while I jet off to discuss Twilight, drink mass quantities and swear like a sailor, I'll do it.
I hate Woody and I don't hate BD as much as some do but I have to admit this idea has merit. I have a feeling Rosenberg is going to ditch the whole imprinting thing - only works on paper and uh okay, not really at all.
Hilarious! I'm afraid if Woody Allen directed, he'd focus a little TOO much on the whole Jacob/Nessie relationship. Fucking dirty old man pig.
Only problem with Woody directing the movie...........it would be about 18 hours long. The man would replace Rob with himself as the "sexy" vampire and have a self-defecating (not in a cute, humble Rob way), stuttering, 3-hr monologue about the meaning of warped relationships and how he can't understand why all of the 14 yr old Asian girls want his body...gag....Also, a giant boob might show up
and start milking everyone to death! (Kudos to you, if you recognize this reference!)
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