First up. More shit in a bottle. This time it's sand. Fucking expensive sand.
I think I could make a killing if I just dump the contents of my suitcase on the beach and fill it with sand. I'll never work again. It'll be like winning the lottery.
Next up. Fun with felting. Brace yourselves -these never end well.
Right we'll start with the nipples. Jesus those things are big. Is it just me or are they a)unevenly spaced and b)angled oddly? Is it just me?
The lips. Was this the person that did the makeup on Twilight and did overkill on the lips? I think it is. Thank goodness he/she found employment again.
Next up, his eyes. I get that New Moon Edward is all thirsty. I also know that Edward said that Bella was his own personal brand of heroin. That does not mean you get to make Edward look like a sleep deprived heroin drag queen that's in withdrawal.
The hair. Were they going for this?
Now I'm not one for scented shit. Creams, lotions, smelly candles, aromatherapy crap and the like. So maybe it's just me, but why the fuck would anyone buy scented shit over the internet. You can't smell it! I hate to be Captain Obvious here - but there's a chance that one person's freesia and lilac smells like your crazy and moldy Aunt Mildred.
Until the iPad comes with a scratch and sniff app you have to trust the seller that this cream smells like Alice. Apparently Alice smells like "sweet fruits, juicy citrus, and delicate florals". "It's a beautiful, bright, happy fragrance!" Goodie - does that mean I'll be beautiful, bright and happy too? Does it?? DOES IT!!?!?!?
I always find one thing I want though. Tonight I found some cute mittens. Apparently they're the ones Bella wears in Twilight. I want to get the pattern for some of these.
They're really pretty and cute!
15 comments:
Yes, I agree. I WANT those mittens.
PMSL to the rest of the products..I wish I too could smell of "Alice"!
Christ, the shite that people sell these days..HELL the shite that people BUY these days...
"Let's start with the nipples"...LMAO!!!!!!
Those mittens look HARD dude...but you are the knitting queen. When things start to weave like a basket on some patterns, I walk away slowly. LOLOL!!!
sign me up for the mittens please!!! make sure you find the kind with the flippie-back/convertible mitten hand part so you can use your fingers when you need to... oh and the almost-even-odder thing in the felt edward pic??? the fact that it looks like they are using a fast-food soda cup and a sweater as their set/props. klassy.
: )
Oh my - the sand from LaPush.. WTH?! I guess there is a sucker born every minute...
Jeebus - fun w/ felting?! PMSL...
no words
@Jayla - I know, I can't believe that someone is so shameless to even try to sell the sand.
@STY - that's got to be the most fugly Edward doll out there. And I noticed the sweater, but not the fast food cup. Why to people have to abuse natural fibers? WHY?!?
@Poptarrts, STY - I am going to try and make them. If I can successfully make a pair, I'll have a giveaway for them. Unfortunately, I can't find a pattern for ones with flaps, so they'd be the plain ones.
@Mrs.P - you confidence in my ability to be all crafty and shit is great, but I've never made mittens!
At first, I thought those were bottles of spices you were going to recommend to us. LOL! The felt Edward was creepy as hell and I couldn't agree more about buying something online that you should smell first. I would need to smell Alice personally before buying ;)
@Mrs. P - Two words: booby tassels
XXXOOO
Lisa
Hey don't make fun of the things I bought!!!
OH MY just kidding!!
The only sand I want from LaPush is the sand I collect when I visit. Oddly I would know what that felt doll was though if I just saw it somewhere...I wouldn't like it but I would know what it was supposed to be at least. I hardly like smelly things when I can smell them, I would never trust something on the internet.
The mittens, know that I would buy. I wonder if my friend can make them, Hmmm I will have to send your post to her.
I love your etsy posts :)
@17foreverlisa - look, making nipple tassells is one thing, but following a pattern might be another.
@Dangrdafne - That's it! You're off the blog roll! Oh wait - you didn't buy them. Thank fuck. Yeah I really really don't like chemically smells. I refuse to buy anything much that's scented.
Come on, CC, I really think you're onto something. When we're in FOOORRRRKKSSS, I do think you should fill your suitcase with LaPush sand. I'll stuff mine with Break Up Scene forest leaves and then we'll go into business. If we can get Mrs P and Lisa as our agents, we can't lose.
CC - Do you knit? Are you on Ravelry? I'm thinking you don't know about Ravelry or you'd have at least 2 pairs of the mittens. Go to ravelry.com and join. It's a knitter/crocheters paradise!
My Bella Mittens:
http://ravel.me/prodgersrn/bm
Bella wears mittens in Twilight? Fuck, can you tell I've only seen it three times?
All this other stuff you talk about is absolute whacko shit to me. I would only buy stuff like Bella's bday dress (the one that STY got), or her parka or the boots, or those fuckawesome mittens, but never would I buy perfume or whatever that said I would smell like Alice, LOL. How ridiculous.
Now I'm feeling kind of stupid that I wanted to order an "Edward" scented candle over the internet. I get way too caught up. It is nice to see something like this to reign me back to my senses.
Edward felt doll, That is so wrong! LOL
@TongueTwied - Hey - nothing wrong with getting something an "Edward scented-something", just make sure you smell it first ;)
The Edward doll is horribly wrong. So wrong.
Can't smell it first. darn it! She makes it sound so good!
http://www.candlesbyvictoria.com/cbv/fragranceshouseblends.html
Look under "E" and "T"
If I order it and don't like it I'll have to run a contest and give it away as a prize. shhh! lol
@TongueTwied - *whispers loudly* Good plan!!
Post a Comment